Adventures in Eagleland
by King Arthur 06
Summary: We got ourselves a long chapter this time around! Unlike most of the time... In this episode, we learn PSI teleport, fight robits, and rescue a certain damsel in distress that's been gone for a while.
1. Knock, Knock

Hey everyone, this is my first fanfic so please be honest in the reviews, I want to make sure I'm doing well with typing, other than that, enjoy.

Something was odd that night; Ness couldn't quite put his finger on it though… "Oh well" he thought to himself, so he decided to hit the hay.

You think Ness in Onett was the only one feeling something off? Paula in Twoson was feeling something as well, she just felt something was… wrong. Jeff in winters felt something off as well, but poor Poo gets left out of the story (you'll find out later, trust me). As Ness was beginning to drift into sleep, *BOOM* "AGH, I'm awake! I'm awake!" Ness sort of said to himself. "Man, what was that?" He walked into Tracy's room, "Hey Tracy, did you hear that?" "How could I not have?" she said. Ness shrugged and left Tracy's room. "Hey mom, did you hear that?" Ness asked, "Of course I did, how could I not have?" "That's exactly what Tracy said…" Ness muttered to himself. "Ness I don't want you to go see what exactly that was, but even if I sent you back to your room you just sneak out." "…So I can go?" "Yes, but change out of your pajamas first!" "*sigh* Fine, (kill joy)." "What was that?" "N-nothing!" he proceeded to run up to his room and change… and trip on his way back down. "Ouch." He then ran out the door to see what was going on. "Pokey? What are you doing here?" "Oh, hey Ness! I just came to see what was going on, don't worry, you're good friend Pokey'll handle this." "Okay… well good luck with that." Ness then headed home and went back to bed. *knock* *knock* *knock* "Oh for god's sake, what now!" Um, hey Ness. "Who said that?" Um, it's the narrator, honestly do your really have to answer the door? "Well, if I didn't it would be anti-climatic." Good point, carry on. "I can talk to animals, I can apparently talk to disembodied voices. What next? Food?" "Hey Ness, honey, could you get the door?" "Wait a second, you want me to answer the door even though it could be a robber or a guy with a gun or even a member of the shark gang!

"Now, now dear, you have to answer it." "Fine!"


	2. A bug versus a robot

Next chapter, yay. No clue how many people are reading but, hey, I'm just starting out

"Who is it?" Ness asked, slightly harshly. "Pokey and Alex?" "Yep." Said the new character. "Pokey came over to my house and decided to wake me up." "I said I was sorry!" said Pokey. "Well anyway, Pokey took Picky (I don't know how to spell his name) up to the meteor an-" Ness cut him off "A meteor? That's what that was!" "ANYWAY!" Alex yelled. "Picky is still up there, and we need to find him." "Fantastic. Alex, Pokey, let's go!" (screen wipe like in cartoon)

"Picky, there you are." Pokey said. "*yawn* Took you long enough, by the way thanks for ditching me!" "…No comment little bro" Pokey said slightly distracted "What's that buzzing?" "Beats the heck outta me" Alex said. "I am BuzzBuzz" Who said that! "Yo, narrator, over here!" I don't recall bugs being able to talk! "*sigh* I'M NOT A BUG. I came from the future to warn you of a coming evil, THE coming evil." Modern art? "SHUT UP NARRATOR!" "I don't know I think he's kinda cool" "YOU SHUT UP TOO, ALEX!" "Alright, jeez!" "Ness, you are one of the chosen four, one who will save the earth from the evil, Giygas. *sigh* You're one of the chosen four as well, Alex." BuzzBuzz finished (sounding exasperated I might add) "So I'm not one of them…?" Pokey asked "No" "Whew, what a relief. C'mon let's go home." *walk* *walk* *walk* "BUZZBUZZ!" *whirr* *clank* "This is bad." What is? "What did I say narrator?" Sorry. *Boss fight tone plays* "Ness, do you have your baseball bat?" Alex asked "Yeah, why" "Because we're gonna beat the tar outta him." "Well where's your weapon?" "I'm wearing them" (brass knuckles) Buzz Buzz used PSI shield Omega, the entire party was enveloped by a shield. Alex took out his pocket knife, Alex mustered all of his couraged and pounced on the starman jr. "Die! Die! DIE!" SMMMMAAAAASSSH or rather SLLLLLLAAAAAAASSSSH 98 damage. How! You're only level 1 "Shut the h*ll up narrator." BuzzBuzz used PK freeze Beta 120 damage, everyone unleashed their fury (except pokey who pretended to cry) 200 damage *victory theme* YOU WON! Alex reached level 2, stats increased Ness reached level 2, stats increased.

"Well that was fun!" Ness said. "Agreed." Alex… agreed. "Man that was scary." "Pokey, you are a crybaby." Said Alex. "Well we're ho- OH GOD THEY'RE BACK!" Pokey said as he saw his parents' car. They walked inside "Hi… mom… hi… dad…" Pokey said nervously. "WHERE HAVE YOU TWO BEEN?" Pokey's dad yelled. "Out." "Out?" "Out." "Being stupid?" "Wh-what?" "Being stupid?" "No." "Good cuz that would be bad." "How bad?" "Really bad." "How bad." "I'd have to punish you." "… let's say due to some crazy mishap I was out being stupid…" "…*takes belt off* I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIFE!" "PICKY RUN!"

(Screen wipe) "Ness, I wish your family would move already. I lent your dad a few hundred thousand dollars (although it could've been a lot less) a year or so back." "Alright, I'm going." "Me too." said Ness and Alex "Aieeeeee it's a cockroach! Kill it with fire!" scream Mrs. Minch. *SMACK* "So this is how I die, *cough cough* by an old woman" "I'M NOT THAT OLD!" "Smacking me, Ness *dramatic music stops for a second, BuzzBuzz's tone sharpens* and Alex *returns to normal* you must go to the sanctuary locations and *gasp* collect the eight melodies. Take the sound stone and fulfill your destiny… g…o…o…d…b…y…e…" "BuzzBuzz! !" "Poor BuzzBuzz. He just…vanished. Ness, I'll see you tomorrow, we'll start our adventure then." "Alright!"


	3. Chapter 3

New chapter FTW

"Hey, Alex. What do you have with you?" Ness asked. "Uh let's see, eight or nine bottles of sweet tea, a book of matches, some sandwiches, my pocket knife, a change of clothes, and an extra bandana. How about yourself?" "My baseball bat, an ATM card, the sound stone BuzzBuzz gave me, a couple burgers, three bags of fries, and a few ketchup packs." "Neato." Ness and Alex had just recently started their adventure and were sent by the mayor to clear out some gang who call themselves the sharks. "Who the heck is that?" Ness shouted *enemy encounter music* "Um, the earthbound wiki says a newage retro hippy." "Alright then." Ness attacked 27 damage, Alex attacked 30 damage. The newage retro hippy returned to normal, YOU WON! Level up, Ness learned PK rockin' alpha, Alex learned PK mouth blast alpha. "PK mouth blast?" Ness asked. "I'll show you in the next fight." In the arcade. "We're here to see Frank Fly." Alex stated. "The door on the left." A shark gang member said. "Ok, thanks." Ness said. "Are you Frank Fly?" Ness asked. "Yes I am, wanna make somethin' of it squirt?" "Um, yeah, the mayor doesn't like what you're doing. He asked us to stop you." Alex told him. "Alright then, BRING IT ON!" You were challenged by Frank Fly. "Alex, care to share PK mouth blast?" "Oh, right. IMA FIRIN' MAH PK BLLLLAAAAAAHHHHH!" 178 damage "O-ow. Pa…in." YOU WO- "I'm not giving up that easily! Get em frankystien mark 2!" "*whiiir* *clank* "What did I say about giving me orders?" *beep* *whir* "Please, get them." "Better" *clank* you were challenged by… a robot… thing… Just kill it! "PK ROCKIN'! the robot was destroyed. EPIC WIN level up!

"Alright you kids win. I'll call off the sharks." Back at the mayors office. "Great job kids! Here is the key to the entertainers shack!" "Alright!" Ness and Alex said in unison. And then they ran out at break neck speed. "Crazy kids."

"The key doesn't work." Alex stated. "What?" "The key doesn't work." "What?" "This key it doesn't work." "What? The key doesn't work?" "Oh wait, I was turning it the wrong way." *click* "There we go!" *cartoon wipe* "So this is giant step? Neat." *the sound stone came out of Ness' pocket and flew over to the main part of the sanctuary* The sound stone recorded the melody of giant step. Good job, Ness! "Thanks, narrator." No problem, I'll now warp you to twoson cuz that's where you need to go! *warp* "Whoa, we didn't have to deal with the police force!" Ness was excited because of that "Hey, a bike shop!" Alex said. they went inside. "Hi." "Oh, customers! What can I do for you!" "I would like a bike." Said Ness. "I would like a skateboard." Said Alex. "We have free promotional displays of both would you like those?" "Yeah sure." Outside. "This is awesome isn't it Ness?" "Heck yeah!" Um guys. Go to burgling park. "Why narrator?" Ness asked. Because I said so. "Alright sure." Burglin park. "Neat place." Said Alex. "Hey, Alex, did you hear something?" "Like what." "Like some guy jumping off a roof." "Yeah I think so." "Hey there kids what are you doin' here?" "Who're-" "Not important. What is is the fact the you're in trouble. "Whaddaya me- wait why's the enemy encounter theme playing?" Everdred challenged you. Alex drank sweet tea. (his favorite drink) and recovered all his stats. Ness lent his turn to Alex. "PK BLAAAAAAAAAH" Everdred was defeated "Alright you defeated me. I'll tell you how to progress go to happy happy village and find Paula. She's in a cabin near happy happy village go there and find her. Oh and when you find her bring her here." "Alright thanks!" So the heroes went on to find Paula. Also here is how the fight with the first sanctuary boss went. "This is a you sanctuary location. But it's mine now. Take it from me if you dare. Muahaha hahaha hahahahahaha!" That's one big ant! Good thing I brought the raid!" "Oh god, no not raid. AAAAAAAAHHHHH I'M MELTING!"


	4. Sweet tea and ATM cards

I'm going on vacation and I won't have access to a computer for a few days so I might put up two today.

"So Mrs. Polestar, we're aware that your daughter is missing." Alex began. "Yes, she had been talking about two boys, um, Ness and Alex, I think." "Okay, we'll try to find her." Ness and Alex had been searching around Twoson for the missing girl, Paula, for quite some time. "Hey, Alex, it's getting late, we should stop at the hotel." "That's probably a good idea." "One room please!" Ness inquired. "That'll be twenty-five dollars. Please enjoy your stay." "Thanks." It had been a long day and the two quickly got to sleep. "Ness, Alex, please I need your help, I don't know where I am, but I can hear water running in the distan-" "Oh hey Paula." Alex said. "How do you know my name?" "Your parents and Everdred sent us out to look for you." "Oh right Everdred has the players guide." "Players what?" "Nothing, nevermind. Hey wait, why are only you talking?" "Ness was out as soon as he got in the bed, forced me to sleep on the couch!" "Oh I'm sorry to hear that…" "No problem, we'll be there tomorrow to help." "Thank you Alex!" "Don't mention it." The next morning. "Wow I slept really well!" Ness said. "How about you, Alex?" "I didn't sleep." "What?" "I didn't sleep." "Why didn't you sleep?" "Your snoring kept me up all night!" "Oh sorry." "Let's go get Paula!" Outside. "The only way forward is peaceful rest valley." Ness said. "Then for the sake of pacing in the story let's go!" *Walk* *walk *walk* "Wait why do I hear the back attack on us tone?" A tree snuck up from behind, Alex deftly flipped behind the opponent. "Since when could you do that Alex?" "Since martial arts class, now kill it!" Alex went into his brute force menu, selected stunning punch. Discombobulates the enemy. "Falcon Paun-" LAW SUIT! "Shoryuke-" LAW SUIT! "Regular punch!" 20 damage to the tree, the tree was stunned. Ness followed up with a PK rockin. The tree exploded! "I'M ON FIRE!" They both said at once, then dove into the creek. YOU WON! Level up! Ness got a fever. "Ness we're in freezing water how do you have a fever?" "I have no clue." "Paula said she could hear water running in the distance from where she was. Let's swim up stream, down stream is Twoson *swim* *swim* *swim* "Hey a cabin!" Ness yelled. "C'mon maybe it's warm in there this water is freezing!" They swam onto shore and went inside. "Hello?" Alex called. "Eek! Who's there?" "Hang on, lemme light a match. There that's better!" "Who're you?" Ness asked "Paula Polestar." "PAULA!" Ness and Alex yelled at once. "Do I know you?" "It's us, Ness and Alex!" "You're here finally! Ness, my knight in shining armor!" "What?" Alex asked. "Oh, uh, nothing, *giggle*" Alex shrugged "The leader of Happyhappyism has the key you have to get i-" Alex kicked the lock and the door swung open "Or you could do that." "All in a day's work m'dear." Paula joined your party! "C'mon boys, let's get going!" "Actually, Ness, Paula, I'll catch up with you guys in a sec I need to get out of these wet clothes!" Outside the cabin. "Thanks for saving me Ness!" She hugged him. "No problem Paula! That's what friends do right?" "Yeah, but still!" "Ready to get going?" Alex asked. "Yeah let's go." Said Paula. Alex nudged Ness "What?" "She likes you!" "She just met me!" "Yeah so?" "Grrr" "Ness and Paula sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" "I will wring your neck Alex!" "Oh, are the feelings returned from you?" "Shut it Alex!" "HAHAHAHA!" "What's going on back there guys?" Paula was in front at the time, the two were lagging behind while arguing. "You love her." "Do not!" "Do too." "Alex shut up!" "There's no hiding it, your blushing!" "No I'm not!" They both realized that Paula was watching. She was blushing too. "Well look at that!" Then Ness and Paula said at once (their face were beet red too) "Shut it Alex!" This just made Alex laugh more. "Oh there's the sanctuary!" Alex said. "This is a my sanctuary location, but it's yours now, give it to me, if you dare!" "Nah we'll keep it, thanks." "Son of a- I admit my mistake you may pass." "YAY" Nice job children! "Who is that?" Paula asked. "Oh that's the narrator, he's pretty nice once you get to know him." Back to Twoson with yah! *FWOOOSH* "Hey we're back! And there's Everdred!" "Nice job kids, here's a wad of bills!" "I don't know why we get these but ok!" "Hey, Ness, Alex! The runaway five are playing at the theater come on let's see them!" "The runaway who?" They both said at once "Just come on!" "Alright sure, come on Ness." "Three tickets please!" "Here you are young lady!" "Yes!" "C'mon guys the show's about to start!" One performance later. "Hey, Ness, Paula, I found a back stage pass." "Then let's go see them!" Yelled Paula "You're a really big fan aren't you?" Asked Alex "I grew up watching them!" "Alright." "Your, backstage pass?" "Right here!" "Go on ahead." Inside. "You guys seem pretty glum." Alex inquired. "We're waist deep in debt right now kid!" "How much?" "10,000 Dollars." "8,000, 9,000, 10,000. Here ya go!" "Alex how did you get that?" Asked Paula. "Everdred." "That was the wad of bills?" "Yeah." "I wanted to use that… *sigh* Oh well!" "We'll be back in a sec kids." A few moments later. "FREEDOM! How can we ever repay you kids?" "Take us to Threed?" "You got it! To the runaway mobile!" They began to head to the tunnel. "Wait! I don't think this is happenin'" "Why not?" Asked Paula. "The stereo is broken and it won't repel the ghosts. "Move over guys." Said Alex. "I don't know much about computers, but I can work with cars." A few moments later. "Turn the siren on, Lucky." *ghost busters siren* "Now go." They went in the tunnel and the ghosts where booking it out of the tunnel. "Great job, man! Here's Threed, we're headin' to the big city!" "Bye guys!" "See ya later kids!"

What awaits our heroes in the city of Threed? Find out next time on Earthbound Z Kai


	5. Is that coffee?

Hey, I decided I would leave you with an extra chapter, because I'm going on vacation. So enjoy.

"This place is kinda glum." Inquired Paula. "Really? What was your first clue? This place is full of zombies!" Said Alex. "C'mon guys, let's just go to the hotel!" Exclaimed Ness. Ever since our heroes had arrived in Threed, they had been attacked by zombie. Perhaps the hotel will shelter them. "One room, please!" Ness asked "That'll be fifty dollars." "Thanks!" They went to their room "Ness, Alex, there are only two beds, counting the fold out couch." "I call the couch!" Said Alex. "Rock, paper, scissors for the bed, Paula?" "Sure, narrator calls." This'll be a two out of three match. I'll start you off, rock… paper… scissors… SHOOT! Tie. *Three tries later* "All ties Paula." "Guess we'll share it?" "Sure why not." The next morning. "So… how did you two sleep?" "Pretty well- Alex I told you I don't have a crush on her!" "Sure…" "Is that coffee?" "No, Ness it's- actually I think it is… Meh." "Morning, Ness, Alex. Is that coffee?" "Yeah, I think so…" Outside the hotel. "Sack em!" "What?- AAH" inside ? "Ugh. Where am I? Ness! Alex! Where are you?" "Here I am, Ness is tied to your back, unconscious." "Why aren't you bound?" "I chewed through them." "Wh-what? Why?" "A man's gotta do, what a man's gotta do." "Agh… my head… where are we…?" "I dunno Ness, here I'll untie you. (Let's see, around and over and… there!)" "Okay Paula. Call for help" "What? Why me?" "Because we know you can. I'm not sure if Alex or I can or not." "Fine!" ("Someone, please help us, I don't know where we are, or who captured us, but we need help, we know we're in Threed though. Someone please…" "Hello?" "Oh thank goodness! Who is this?" "Uh, this is Jeff." "Jeff who?" "Jeff Andonuts… Wait I'm not on the phone… how?" "Jeff, I have psychic powers, relax." "Oh okay, that make perfect sense. You said you were in Threed right?" "Uh yeah why?" "Alright, I'm headin' south, way south." "Where are you?" "Winters") "Alright. Let's hope Jeff can do it." Winters. "*YAWN* Alright, to Threed." *Sneak* *Sneak* *Creak* "Hm, Jeff? What are you doing up at this hour?" "Going to Threed." "You say that like it's no big deal! That's miles away!" "I have to help some girl and her friends." "A girl? I mean… I'll help you, but we need to get you some supplies." "How?" "Raid the lockers of course!" *Walk* *Walk* "Hey Max! We need the key to the lockers!" "Why is that Tony?" "Tony wants to steal from the lockers to help me." "No! Not steal! Borrow!" "Sure…" "Oh sure! Here ya go!" "Thanks." The locker room. "*Sigh* The key doesn't work." "What was that Jeff?" "The key doesn't work." "What?" "This key, it doesn't work." "What? The key doesn't work?" "This key doesn't work, it's bent." "Oh hey Jeff! What's the matter?" "This key doesn't work." "Well, here I invented a machine that'll unlock anything! It's probably valued at millions and millions of dollars in the world of thieves but I can always invent another!" "Alright… thanks." "Outside snow wood boarding school. "Alright Jeff, hop on my back and I'll boost you over the- MY BACK!" "Oh sorry Tony." "That's okay, Jeff remember, even if you leave, we'll always be best friend, right?" "Sure thing Tony, see ya later!" "Well now that that's over- wait since when was there a shop here?" Inside random shop FTW. "Hello there, child! Would you like a pack of gum? It's only a dollar!" "I have a dollar." "Great! It comes with a free monkey!" "Can I sell it too a poacher for millions?" "Ko ko ko kee kee kieu ki! (HEY!)" "Sorry monkey." BUBBLE MONKEY JOINED YOUR PARTY! "Yeah that's great." On the shore of what I assume to be the equivalent of loch ness in Eagle land. "Hey who are you guys?" "We are the tessie watching club!" "That's great. I need to get across the lake." "Great, I assume something will come along if you rest in a tent and have some of Earl's son of a b*%# stew!" "Sorry, I'm trying to cut back on cow liver." "Well Chuck makes some mighty fine tomato stew." "I'll have that." The next morning. "I see her!" "See who?" "You said your name is Jeff right?" "Yeah." "That's tessie Jeff! Go say hello." "Um hello tessie." "Ko ko kee ko kieu ko (GIMME BUBBLEGUM NOW!)" "Here ya go monkey." "Ko ko kee ko kieu ko kee. (Get on tessie)" On the other side of loch tess. "Walkin through a cave. What is that?" "This is a your sanctu- your not Ness." "Oh, what's up?" "Nothing much, just being a follower of giygas- wait why am I talking to you? You're going to help him!" "Meh." Outside the cave "ko ko ki kieu ko ki (Wow that's one cute monkey. Later loser!)" "Oh hey a lab." Inside. "Hello?" "What are you doing in my lab?" "You're Doc. Andonuts, right?" "Yes, are you the TV repairman? I expected you to be taller." "No, it's your son, Jeff." "Oh Jeff! It's been like ten years!" "Wait you left me at the boarding school since I was 3?" "Not important, what do you need?" "Anyway to get to Threed?" "Yes, that skyrunner over there!" "Great, I'm out!" "Wait I need to tell you the- controls." *one epic skyrunner montage later!* *BOOM* "Well that's one way to land." "Who are you?" Yelled/asked Paula. "I'm Jeff." "JEFF! You came!" "Oh, are you Paula?" "Yes!" "And who're your friends?" "This is Ness, and Alex." "It's a pleasure to meet you Jeff." Said Alex. "Likewise. Nice to meet you Ness!" "The pleasure is all mine. Now let's get out of here!" What awaits our heroes in Threed now that they can get out of the holding facility with Jeff's bad key machine? Find out next chapter!


	6. A lone jar of fly honey

Forget what I said in chapter one about Poo. We're rockin' with the chosen 5!

Also, I couldn't update because we drove to the destination of vacation, and I didn't have access to a computer. Other than that, on with the show.

"So, Jeff, you came from Winters?" Paula asked. "That's right." Replied Jeff. After our heroes daring escape from their prison, they were now mucking about Threed. "Hey guys, look! A circus tent!" Ness exclaimed. "Why don't we go check it out?" Alex suggested. "Sure, why not." Paula agreed. "Hey guys… it won't open." Ness stated. "What do you mean?" Jeff asked. "I mean it won't open!" "Guys, it has a face." *battle tune* "A living… circus tent?" "I don't know Paula. It could be anything. We could be hallucinating." Alex said. "Anyone have a lighter?" "Jeff, why do you need a lighter?" Ness asked. "Bottle rockets." "What?" "You know the bottle rockets they make at fire work stores?" "Yeah." "I make and use them as weapons." "Uh, Jeff, isn't that illegal?" Asked Paula. "Not if you have a license." "You have a license to make bottle rockets?" "Here, Jeff, I have a book of matches." "Thanks, Alex." "S'what I do." *BOOM* YOU WON Alex leveled up! Stats increase! Alex learned PSI laser. "Well that was fantastic, Jeff." Paula said sarcastically. "No problem." Ness rummaged around in the trash can. Jeff got a jar of fly honey. "Why do I have to carry it?" "Because everyone else's inventory is full." "Hey a cave." Alex pointed out. "Well what do we do if we see a cave?" Ness asked the party. "Go inside." Paula stated bluntly "Sounds like your getting bored, Paula." Alex said. "Let's just go in the cave!" "This is a long cave." Said Jeff. A stomach growling echoed through the cave. "Ugh, I'm hungry." Stated Alex. "We all are." Paula said. "Than why haven't we eaten?" "Because we don't have anything!" "Well someone is cranky!" "Shut up, Alex!" "Alex, Ness, does she always get this way when she's hungry?" Jeff asked. "Yep." Alex stated. "Guys, we have four meals from the Onett burger shop." "Than, let's eat!" Alex said. "*BELCH!* Oh sorry." "Ness, there's only so much oxygen in this cave!" Paula yelled. Jeff turned on his pocket fan. "Thanks." Paula said. One meal later, our heroes made it to the end of the tunnel."

"What is this place?" Jeff asked. "This is Saturn Valley! Boing!" Said Mr. Saturn. "It's… it's… ADORABLE!" Screamed Paula. "Paula! Please!" Alex said, agitated. "Uh, Mr. Saturn. Is there a hotel around here?" Ness asked. "Yes, the round one! Dakota!" "What round one? They're all round." Jeff asked/said. "The round one! Boing!" "Oh! I see the "round" one." "Yes!" "*murmur* Paula which one?" Asked Alex. "*murmur* I don't know just go into the first one, I think that's the hotel. *speaking* Thank's Mr. Saturn!" "You're welcome! Kay-O" Inside the hotel. "One night, please!" Ness said. "Boing! That'll be zero moneys!" "Okay…" One evening later. "OW, MY BACK!" Alex yelled getting up. "Mr. Saturn must be really limber." Jeff brought up. "Well what did you expect sleeping on a stool." Paula said. "Well, Jeff, you're not complaining." Ness stated. "I didn't sleep." "Why didn't you sleep?" "I was up, fixing this broken syringe." "Well that wouldn't have taken that long." "I was up fixing the ladder leading to the phone. The rungs were bent." "Jeff, you must have OCD." Alex stated. "SHUT UP!" "My god, he is." "OK, maybe a little." "Paula has blood sugar issues, Jeff has OCD. What next?" Alex thought to himself. Outside the hotel. "Hey, have you seen a weird natural formation anywhere?" Ness asked. "Boing! Yes! Behind factory at grapefruit falls. You say password and wait three minutes. Dakota!" "Alright guys! Let's go to grapefruit falls!" Across Saturn valley. "Uh, password?" Ness said. "Incorrect." "Leave it to me!" Alex said. He took out his cellphone. "Hello, Mach Pizza? I would like one pizza with every thing on it. Saturn Valley. Thanks. *Hangs up* C'mon let's meet the delivery guy at the front." Entrance to Saturn valley "Did you order a pizza with everything?" "Yep. Here's your money." "Thanks." Grapefruit falls. Ness disguised his voice. "Pizza delivery!" "Frank! Your pizza's here!" "YAY!" The heroes snuck past. "So this is the factory?" Paula thought aloud. "Yeah. This is the factory." Ness said. "Look at all these enslaved Mr. Saturn! Ness, we have to help them!" Paula yelled. "Okay, we have to find the master." Ness said. "Oh, thank you Ness!" "Hey guys, look. A living mass of barf." Jeff pointed out. "Excuse me? Living pile of vomit?" Alex yelled over at the mass. "Who dares *Burp* call master *belch* a living pile of vomit?" "I do." Alex said. BTW I did the master belch thing on purpose. "Well I heard your plan of *BUUUUURP* freeing the mister Saturn. I'm not gonna *Belch* let that happen!" Epic boss fight! *psst* Jeff, use the fly honey! "Thanks narrator." Jeff coated a bomb in fly honey. "*gasp* Is that fly honey? *NOM NOM NOM* Hm, I feel odd- *BOOM* YOU WON! LEVEL UP!

What awaits our heroes after the incident with master belch? Find out next time!


	7. Adventures in Eagleland: Pokey's return!

So, about the last chapter, I had typed it up on Monday and was going to update, but then the internet failed. So, here we have, the next chapter.

The sound stone recorded the melody! After our heroes defeated Master Belch, they recorded the melody of the sanctuary in Saturn valley. "Success!" Ness yelled. "Yes, Ness. Success." "Paula said, blankly. "Great, now we get to go back to dark, dreary, and depressing." Jeff said, faking enthusiasm. "I don't know, maybe things have changed?" Alex suggested. "Just cut to the wipe!" Paula said.

Back at Threed. "Wow, it looks relatively nice now!" Ness said. "Yeah, the sun actually exists." Jeff said, dryly. Alex began to sang "Sunshine on my shoulders-" "Yeah let's NOT do that." Paula said. "Ok…" "Guys, quit with the chatter, and let's get a move on to Fourside." Ness said, impatiently. "To the bus stop, AWAAAAY!" Alex yelled. "To Fourside, please." Ness said. "That'll be one dollar." *A few minutes later* "Sorry, kids, this is where I let you off, there's a traffic jam." "Shoot. Guess we're walking." Jeff said "Yeah." Paula said, angrily. "Hey a drug store!" Ness said. "C'mon." Jeff said, walking towards it. "Jeff, we're already stocked up on supplies!" Paula said. "It's not what's in the drugstore, it's around back." "Hey there kids." The arms dealer said, lighting a cigarette off the butt of another. "What can I do for you? *Puff*" "*Cough* *wheeze* Sir there's only so much breathable air on the planet!" Paula said. "I'll have that Shot-gun, and a few big bottle rockets." Jeff said. "Here you go, come back later! *Puff*" "Jeff, I'm beginning to question your choice in suppliers." "Relax, Paula!" "Hey, a mine!" Ness pointed out. "I hope this goes better than the circus tent incident…" Paula mumbled under her breath. "Give him a break, Paula!" Alex said. "Pardon me." Ness asked. "What are you doing?" "We're mining. We don't have anyone to give any of this to and we have plenty of money ourselves, so we'll give the money to you!" "Ok, go with what works, I guess." Jeff said "WAAHH. Random encounter!" Alex used PSI laser. "Ka-me…" LAW SU- "NO, I'm doing this attack! Ha-me… HAAAA!" YOU WON! Ness learned a bunch of healing PSI! Paula learned a bunch of offensive PSI! So, after a long trek through the desert, our heroes made it to Fourside.

"Monotoli. Has anyone heard that name before?" Alex asked. "No. Nope. Uh-Uh." A Wallah of synonyms for no arose from the group. "Shall we go inside?" A wallah of synonyms for yes. "Great!" Inside the Monotoli building. "Excuse me." Ness and company walked up to the front desk. "What is the Monotoli building?" Ness asked. "The Monotoli building is the main business in The city of Fourside." Said the hateful witch who called herself the secretary. "What's so special about it?" Ness asked. "If you have any further questions, please visit the top floor." "Okay thanks!" Inside the elevator. "This elevator takes you to the forty-seventh floor. I assume that's where you want to go." "Yeah, sure." Jeff said. "Alright, this won't take very long, JUST DON'T STARE AT MY HIPS!" "…Are you alright?" Paula asked. "Yes, why?" "Uh no reason…" Ness began humming along to the elevator music. "YOU'RE STARING AT MY HIPS!" The elevator woman screamed at Alex. "Uh, no I'm not." "I must say, Miss, those are some pretty big hips." Jeff said. "So YOU were staring!" "No, I just happened to have glanced over." She twitched. "Ok, here's your stop, NOW GET OUT!" "I say we take the stairs next time." Ness said. "Agreed." Alex, Paula and, Jeff said at the same time. "Excuse me, is this Monotoli's office?" Paula asked. "Yes it is! Wanna make somethin' of it?" "Pokey?" Ness and Alex asked, surprised. "Yep, it's me! And I'm Monotoli's right hand man!" "Who's Pokey?" Jeff and Paula asked. "Pokey, USED, and I stress used to be our next door neighbor and friend." Alex said. "Well, clearly, we're not friends anymore! Now out of Mr. Monotoli's office! You two! Numb-skulls! Get them outta here!" *BOOT* "They literally kicked us out!" Ness said. "CHILD ABUSE!" Alex yelled. Outside the Monotoli building. "Well that was fantastic." Jeff said, sarcastically. "Uh, guys. The runaway five are playing at Topolla Theatre!" Alex pointed out. "Then what are we waiting for, let's go!" Paula yelled. Inside the theatre. "Four tickets please!" Ness requested. "Here you are, five dollars, please." "Okay, thanks!" "Paula, just curious, why do the two in front bring microphones up on stage if they don't use them?" "SHHH! They're starting!" One amazing concert later. "Let's go backstage!" Paula said. "Uh, we don't have a pass." Jeff pointed out. "We'll just sneak past." "Okay then." Alex said. Insert James Bond music and sneaking about. "You guys can't seem to stay out of debt." Alex said out of nowhere. (Cause they, ya know, snuck in) "GAH! Oh, it's you guys. I'm easily startled. No, we can't can we? We're in WAY over our heads this time!" "How much?" Alex asked. "One MILLION dollars." "GAH!" Alex yelled out of surprise. "Man, I'm getting to old for this, kids. My blood pressure is going through the roof! Being in debt is really stressful." "Don't worry lucky! We'll get you out of this!" Paula said, full of pride.

What awaits our heroes, getting the runaway five out of debt? "A lot." Jeff! It clearly states in your script your not supposed to break the fourth wall! "*Sigh* Cut!"


	8. Atlatls R Us

I have several fanfictions planned for when I finish this, mainly Nintendo series. But, I do take my sweet time to write these chapters. So, one at a time.

Last, time we left our heroes, Paula got everyone to see the Runaway Five concert at Topolla Theatre. They went backstage and promised the Runaway Five they would get them out of debt. In between chapters, Alex bought girl scout cookies without anyone else's consent. But they're still delicious, so, everyone was fine with it. However, they finished them, so we don't get to see any dialogue related to them whatsoever. Now we get back to them. Narrator out.

"*Sob*" "Hey, wait a second… I hear someone" Paula said. "And they're crying." "…A sesame… seed?" Alex said, perplexed. "Hey, what's the matter?" Ness asked the sesame seed. "Oh, hello. I'm Black sesame seed" "So we gathered." Jeff butt in. To which Paula slapped him upside the head. "I said some things to my girlfriend, White sesame seed, that made her mad. Then, the cruel tides of fate swept and the wind blew me away from her. All I want to do is see her one last time, and apologize…" "Lame." Jeff said, without the slightest amount of pity. "Jeff!" Paula yelled at him. "Well, Black sesame seed. We're the chosen four, and we'll try our best to find White sesame seed!" Paula said with enthusiasm. "Well, guys. I'll be grinding on enemies for a bit for a weapon the writer just made up. See you soon." Alex said, while running off into the desert. "Well I'm going to find White sesame seed. Are you coming with me?" Paula asked. "I'm going back to Fourside to see if I can find some weapons or ammo." Jeff said. "Same here, but with baseball bats and such." Ness said. "Fine, I guess we'll meet up in the entrance to Fourside?" Paula asked. "What about Alex?" Jeff asked. "He'll figure it out." Paula said.

Some time later… "Hey, Paula we didn't see you at the entrance to Fourside so we came looking for you…" Ness said, and stopped short. "C'mon, C'mon… Dangit!" Paula exclaimed. "Who are these guys?" Alex asked, coming out of the desert. "These are the three Sanchez brothers. This slot machine broke down and now, out of the kindness of their hearts, take place of the slots." "You do realize they collect the money. Right?" Jeff asked. "… So, Alex, did you get that weapon?" Paula asked. "Yes, also, lemme try on the slots, I got a crap ton of luck from leveling up." Alex deposited the money. "five…THOUSAND DOLLARS?" Ness exclaimed. "DO WE EVEN HAVE THAT MUCH?" "Yeah… well, I do at least. Let's see, seven… seven… seven." The money began to pour out. "We're rich!" Paula yelled. "Mmm, quite." Alex said. "Why don't we go repay the Runaway Five?" Ness asked. "Pff, no way we're spending this on them!" Paula said. (By the way this was happening on the way back to Fourside.) "Hey, the mine has expanded!" Alex pointed out. "Hey, guys. How's the mine coming along?" Ness asked. "Well, but…" "But what?" "It appears there are some moles in the way… you can go in there and exterminate them, then we would REALLY owe you guys whatever we find." "Alright, we'll take a look." Inside the mine. "It's dark in here." Stated Paula. "Thank you, Captain Obvious." Jeff said, sarcastically. "Oh, shut up! Anyway, we should be looking for the moles." "How much trouble can one mole cause?" Ness asked. "Ahem, we are the mole masters! Each one of us is stronger or weaker than the last." "Well, we were hired to exterminate you…" Alex said. "O rly?" "Yeah, we're not using memes in this fanfiction." Paula said. "Alright, fine! Let's battle!" "The battle background says he's the third strongest." Jeff pointed out. "Hypocrite." Paula mumbled under her breath. "By the way, what weapon did you get?" Ness asked. "An atlatl!" "A what?" Ness asked, to which Jeff told him: "An atlatl is a spear throwing weapon." "SPEAR!" Alex cried as he launched one. YOU WON! Level up! Awesome! Alex learned PK crash Alpha and PSI laser Beta. Epic! Paula learned fire, freeze, and thunder beta. Holy, sweet, mother of god! Ness learned rockin' beta! "Awesome level up!" Alex said. "Okay, this is gonna take to long." Jeff planted bombs and blew up the tunnel! "That was effective!" Alex said enthusiastically. "We did it." Jeff said to the miners. "Great, we found a diamond lying on the ground! Here you can have it!" You got the thing! "Let's head back to the Topolla theatre to repay the debt!" Paula said.

At Topolla theatre, after they repaid the person who was holding the runaway five in debt and this definitely isn't a run on sentence! "We don't know how to thank you guys enough! I mean, you got us out of debt twice!" "No need to mention it, Lucky." Ness said. "It's getting pretty late, Ness. Maybe we should stop at a hotel." "Good idea, Paula!" In the hotel room cuz it's pointless to show them getting the room! "Okay, we have the issue of bedding arrangements, again." Alex said "Before this happens again. We'll do the same thing as last time, but Jeff or Alex will sleep on the floor." Paula said. "I brought a sleeping bag for a reason." Jeff said. "Okay it's settled." The next morning! "Ness." Paula woke Ness up. "Ness, it's time to get up!" "Okay… I'm awake… *YAWN*" "Alex and Jeff got breakfast while we were still asleep." "No effing rush to save the world or anything! Sleep in as long as you please! Giygas is in absoulutely no hurry to destroy earth or anything!" Alex yelled through a mouthful of eggs. "Sorry! What time is it?" "Use your eyes." "Oh, Nine thirty, how nice."

What awaits our heroes in Fourside after this? Find out next episode! H8rs gonna h8.


	9. LEEEEEROY JENKINS!

Welcome back to another exciting episode of Adventures in Eagleland! Lately I've been busy with vacationing and being in the Rockies on vacation, and minecraft. But now we have another chapter! Now with more content! Hopefully. Also I have more fanfictions planned for the future of the Mother series, and stuff. But for now, this will consume my writing time. Please enjoy!

Last time we left our heroes, Alex got an atlatl, gambled in the middle of the desert with human beings instead of slots, and learned Ness likes to sleep in. I learned that our Author is bad at updating, probably gonna get fired for that one. In this rousing episode, things will happen, stuff will go down, and I'm bad at intros!

"What's new in Fourside?" Ness asked to no one in particular. "We could go to the museum." Jeff replied. "Figures you'd suggest that above all things…" Paula murmured under her breath. "Well, seeing as we have NO idea whatsoever where the next sanctuary is, I'm up for it." Alex said. "Why not?" Ness asked. "I'm up for it if you guys are." Paula said. "To the museum, than." Alex said. Inside the museum. "This place is pretty cool." Alex stated. "Hey, what's in here?" Paula asked the guy who was standing in front of the door that said: No entrance. "Oh, this is the desert exhibit, this has various stuff from Scaraba in it, like some hieroglyphs, but it's under maintenance so you can't go in!" "What about for a new employee? Alex is willing to do some work!" "No I'm not Paula, how about we sell you for medical experiments and then bribe him!" "Okay, we're not giving up someone for work or selling anyone for medical experiments!" Ness stepped up and said. "What will you let us in for?" Jeff asked. "An autographed photo of Venus. Here's the picture, just get her to sign it." "Who's Venus?" Alex asked. "Venus is the new entertainer at Topolla, she replaced the runaway five." "Wait, it's only been one night. How did she get the job so quickly?" "Don't know. Don't care. Just get the autograph!" "Okay, okay, we'll get it!" "Thank you kids!" Outside the museum. "Son of a!" Ness yelled as he fell to the street. "Ness, are you okay?" Paula rushed to his side. "Yeah, I just tripped over that manhole cover. Wait… WHERE'S THE SOUND STONE?" Ness exclaimed. "Calm down, my friend. It's floating above the manhole." Alex said. Then it flew into the sewer. Ness was sitting there with a look of sheer horror on his face. (for those of you who have played or watched up to the point where the Mario bros. learned baby cakes in partners in time, the way elder toadsworth looked when they crushed baby peach.) "Wait, Ness. Remember at giant step where the sound stone came out of your pack and flew up to record the first melody?" Alex asked. "Y-yeah…" "Maybe it's working the same right now." "Maybe. Only one way to find out, right?" Ness asked. "Yep. Who's first?" Paula asked. "LEEEEEERRROOOOYYY JENKINS!" Alex yelled as he jumped in the manhole. "…After him!" Paula told the others. One by one the chosen four went into the sewers. "Alex? Where are you?" The three others called. Apparently, Alex had fallen into the water. "I see bubbling over there!" Paula yelled. "*mixed with coughing* Oh god I think I got some in my mouth!" Alex said as he swam over to the concrete surrounding the water. "Alex!" The three others yelled. "Hey, how's the water?" Jeff asked. "Why do you ask?" "Stay in there, looks like the only way forward is to wade." Jeff said plainly. He looked over to Paula who looked back with a horrified expression across her face. "YOU WANT ME TO WADE IN THAT?" Paula yelled at/asked Jeff. "It's the only way, Paula." Ness said. "No no no no no. There HAS to be another way." "MAN UP!" Alex yelled at Paula. "Fine, but if my dress is ruined, YOU'RE paying for another!" "No, problem." After awhile of wading through the sewers. "Guys, we can't wade through this we have to go under." Ness told the gang. He was right, they can't walk past, they must go under. "Paula you don't have to, but we would appreciate it if you would." Ness said, trying to comfort her the least he could. "Screw it! You guys have forced me to do all this crazy stuff, I might as well do this, afterwards, we are going to a hotel and we are all going to bathe, you're smell is unbearable as is." They all dove under water. Conversing via telepathy: "This is why I brought goggles." Alex said. "Well whoopty frickin doo!" Paula said. "You guys Jelly?" "Shut up, Alex." *GASP* *Coughing* "We made it." Ness said. "Hey, a giant sewer rat." Jeff pointed out. "Oh like we're gonna believe tha- HOLY SH*T!" Paula screamed. "This is a "Your sanctuary location" But it's mine now. Take it from me, if you dare muahahaha" Boss fight! "Hey guys, did I tell you I learned a new technique while grinding for my atlatl?" Alex asked "No." Jeff said. "Great, I'll use it." Jeff used his spy, spotted out the weaknesses of the Plague rat of doom. Paula used PK Fire beta. Ness used Rockin' beta. Alex used PSI rush. Alex charged into the enemy at full force, bounced off of the rat and did it again, and again, and again. "WHAPOW!" Alex yelled as the damage counter went up. 270 damage! Combined with fire and rockin, Holy crap…" YOU WON! EVERYONE LEVELED UP FTW! "Oh, cool sanctua- this is someone's back yard." Paula said. "Well, it's a sanctuary at the very least." Ness said. The sound stone recorded the melody of this sanctuary. "Alex, help us over the fence." Paula told him. "Kay." "It's getting dark, looks like we have to go to the hotel!"

Inside the hotel room. "How long is it going to take Paula to finish with her shower?" Alex asked Ness, slightly agitated. "Well, as you know girls take forever to get ready." Ness said. "I fixed this broken can." Jeff told the Ness and Alex. "What did you turn it into?" Ness asked. "A Can of peanut brittle." "Can I have some?" Ness asked. "Sure." Jeff said with a slight smile on his face. "Thanks." Fake snake things come out. "HAHAHA!" Jeff Laughed. "Oh, real mature."

This seems similar to last episodes end. Anyway, I'm going to go play minecraft now, see ya later!


	10. Venus is out of your league

Hello Fanfiction community! How's it going? Welcome back to another exciting episode of Adventures in Eagleland! Any questions or comments? Put them in the reviews. Anyway, I would like to direct you to Shadowdragon500. He is an author on (obviously), and so far he has done: a dragon ball story, and a sonic story. He might have done other things but I haven't checked his page in a while. Also, you should probably know, I fired the old narrator. That's what you get for disrespecting the author. If he apologizes, he'll probably get his job back, anyway. On with the other narrator.

Welcome back to Adventures in Eagleland. In the last episode, our heroes toured a museum, learned they had to get an autographed photo of Venus back to the museum curator, and traversed the sewers. Also, Paula blew all the hot water for their hotel room. What will happen this episode? Things, things will happen.

"Four tickets, please." Ness asked, getting them into the theatre to see Venus and, hopefully, get the photo autographed. "Sure, here you go." "Now, all we have to do is watch the show and get backstage to get the autograph." Ness told the rest of the gang. "By the way, Ness, I love the fact you're so enthusiastic about getting that autograph." Alex said, mockingly. "Shut up! I'm just doing it so that we can get that information to get to the next sanctuary!" Ness said while blushing. "Would you two just please shut up!" Paula yelled at them. "I think I see some open seats." Jeff said. "Great, come on." Alex said. *One show later* "Jeff, I know what you're thinking, but Venus is out of your league." Alex said. "Alex, why must you reveal that to everyone else?" Jeff asked Alex. "Oh, that's because they can read minds to and they would have found out eventually." "Good to know…" *knock* *knock* "Excuse me? Miss Venus!" Ness yelled whilst knocking on the door. "Oh, hello?" "Can you sign this photo?" "Aren't you a little young to have a crush on me?" "This isn't for me." "Well, uh, sure. I just need to find a pen." "I have one." Alex said, walking up to Venus' dressing room. "Thanks." Venus said to Alex. "Bye!" Ness said while the gang was walking away. (By the way, I know that it was a banana peel that was signed in the actual game, but I'm doing it with the photo because I can.) In the museum. "Here's your photo." Paula said, handing the photo to the curator. "Thank you. Here are the keys. I'm going to go spend a few hours alone with it." "…Okay…" Alex said. "That was weird" Jeff said. "but we got the keys!" "Great let's go inside!" "Are those…" Paula said, trailing off. "Yep, they're mummies." Ness said. "That one saw us!" Paula said, frightened. "Here he comes!" Paula screamed. Alex used PSI Rush outside of battle. It completely obliterated them. YOU WON! "That was, um, effective." Jeff said. "Quite." Alex said in response. "They're hieroglyphics." Jeff said. "Thank you Captain obviou-" Paula began to say before Jeff cut her off. "They depict a dance. I'll translate them and keep it in my journal." "How do you know that?" Alex asked. "I studied Scarabian culture in snow wood." "Cool." Outside of the museum. "What to do now?" Ness asked. "Why don't we go shopping for new equipment and items?" Paula suggested. "Sure why not." Alex said. "Jeff?" "Sure." Inside the mall. "We'll split up, buy what gear we want, and meet back at the pay phone. Okay?" Ness stated the plan. Everyone agreed. Ness: Ness went to get some food for healing later. Then he would go get his gear. "Three deluxe pizzas please." Ness asked the guy at the pizza place. "That's a lot of food. You're not going to be able to eat it all." "No, it's not all for me, it's for me and my friends." "Alright, sure. Here you go." You got the pizzas! "Thanks." Ness, thinking to himself: Now for some gear. "I would like the Mr. Baseball series." "That'll be 20.99" "Thanks for the supplies." Paula: "I want, these shoes, that dress, that ribbon…" "I can't keep up with you kid! Slow down!" "Fine, I guess you don't want my business!" "We do want your business and your money but I can't keep up with you!" "Alright, that's it than, all the stuff I picked out." Paula paid for all of her stuff, then went down to the pay phone to meet up with everyone. Alex: "I'll have that macho brace." "Sure thing, it's really heavy though, are you sure you can handle it?" "Positive. Also I'd like to sell my iron brace." "Alright. That covered the tab for the macho brace…" "So, no loss or gain in money whatsoever?" "Yeah." "Rocking" Alex thought to himself while going to the payphone: What did the other guys get? Jeff: Behind the mall. "And so, that's how I got to be the arms dealer." "That's a pretty cool story." "Thanks for listening. What'll it be?" "That shotgun, that broken tube, and a sh*t ton of ammo." "Here you go, thanks for the business." "Thanks for the story." Jeff thinking to himself. Better get back to the payphone and meet up with them. Back together: "Hey guys!" Jeff said walking over to the payphone. "Hey, Jeff! We were just talking about what we got while waiting for you." Paula said, signaling for Jeff to come over. "Hey, the lights are flickering." Alex pointed out. "What the heck?" Ness yelled as the lights went out. "AAAAAGH! NESS, ALEX, JEFF, HELP!" Paula screamed. "Paula!" Ness yelled. Intercom comes on. "Would Ness, Jeff, and Alex please come to the top floor? MUAHAHAHA!" OH NO! What will become of Paula? Will our three other heroes ever find her? And will there be an end to all these questions? Find out… NEXT TIME!


	11. Emoclew ot Edisnoom

And so, I have decided to update Adventures in Eagleland! Hooray! Anyway, sorry about not updating in awhile, I've been traveling a lot, and when I do get on the computer, I'm playing World of Warcraft.

"Even when the girl is one of the heroes, she gets kidnapped. BIG SURPRISE!" Alex said, not very amused. The now three heroes were on their way to find Paula, journeying through the now empty mall. Ness was using a flashlight that he had brought along. "Even though the power is out, we still feel the need to use the up escalator as apposed to the down." Jeff said under his breath. "We're here! Where are you?" Ness yelled out. "Right here!" The three boys screamed simultaneously and whipped around. *Boss battle tone* Just as they went into battle, Ness's flashlight went out. "Guess I should've gotten more batteries, huh? Anyway, PK ROCKIN' BETA!" *BOOM* *CRASH* Jeff whipped out his triple barreled shot gun. "Is that legal?" Alex asked. Jeff responded. "Only in Eagleland! HAHAHA!" He fired off all three shots at once. Then Alex used PK crash. "AAGH!" YOU WON! "That was easy." Ness said. "NOW WHERE'S PAULA!" "*cough* *cough* Far away from here. Ha Ha *WHEEZE*" "We never got a really good look at him did we?" Alex asked. "Not really." Jeff responded. "Let's ask around and try to find her." Ness suggested. "I know a place!" Jeff chimed in. "Where!" Ness asked excitedly. "The café/bar." "To that place, then!" Alex yelled.

At the café/bar. "No one knows anything about Paula…" Ness sounded disappointed. Of course, nobody can tell another man's feelings. "While Alex sits over there at the bar drinking coffee!" "Chill Ness, I'm asking around, and I think I got something." "Wait, where's Jeff?" Ness asked. "He's over there, tearing up the dance floor. Go retrieve him and I'll share what I've heard."

"So…" Alex began. "Rumor has it that there's some kind of secret entrance at the bar. Nobody specified where it goes, but they said it might help us find her." "Great, where is it?" Ness asked. Alex guided them over. "They said to press right… here." There was a brief blinding light and they were in some kind of weird twisted dimension. "Emoclew ot Edismoon!" "What?" Ness asked. "Welcome to Moonside!" "Moon… side?" "Yes, Moonside!" "It looks like Fourside… but warped. Jeff, did your arms dealer friend persuade us into using drugs?" "Not that I'm aware of." "How do we leave moonside?" Alex asked. "You must defeat the ManiMani statue!" "Where's that?" "In the center of Moonside!" "Great… thanks… I guess." Ness said as the three walked away.

Later. "Is this the ManiMani statue?" Ness asked. "I think so…" Jeff said. Alex then walked up and touched it. *Boss theme.* "Seriously! Two bosses in one chapter! It's unheard of!" Jeff said. Ness and Alex then turned to him at the same time and yelled. "QUIT BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!" THE MANI MANI STATUE USED PK ROCKIN'? Alex is down! "Alex, no!" Ness used the refreshing herb! Alex is back in the fight. Ness used PK Flash! It's super effective! I mean… It did 424 damage. Alex used Lariat! SMAAAAAAAAAAASH. 200 damage! Jeff used his shotgun! KERBLOOOOOEY! The ManiMani statue was defeated. Level up, learning of abilities, and a rare drop for Ness. The illusion was broken and the three heroes woke up.

Well that was an exciting episode! Tune in next time for more. Adventures in Eagleland!


	12. The one where Everdred fell

I haven't updated in a while… sorry for that. I'm going to attempt to make this a long chapter, I may not succeed because something draws me away from the computer, but, I'll try.

"Where… are we?" Ness asked to no one in particular. In the last episode of Adventures in Eagleland, we joined our heroes in the trippy world of Moonside. There was a ManiMani there, those being under the control of Giygas, the group of three heroes wound up destroying it, and returning to the real world. "You were wandering around the warehouse, your eyes were glazed over and after about an hour, you destroyed that creepy statue." There was a mouse in the warehouse of the café/bar that explained what had just happened. "So... wait… Ness, we still haven't found Paula!" Alex yelled at Ness, concerned for their missing friend. "You're right! Thanks Mr. Mouse! Here's a piece of cheese!" Ness said, running back into the café. "Oh boy, cheese! OMNOMNOM!"

And so our three dear friends, Ness, Jeff, and Alex, sat down for a drink. "Dangit Alex gimme some of that coffee!" Ness yelled at Alex. "No." "Why not!" "If you wanted coffee you should've gotten some. Besides, we came here to gather information, not coffee." "Just one sip?" "Ness, I seriously doubt the fact you'll like black coffee." The look on Ness' face turned from greed to disgust. "WHY!" "Because that's what I do." To which Jeff asked: "Is that seriously black coffee?" Alex responded with: "No, it's loaded to the gills with flavoring." Ness looked over his shoulder to see someone from the Escargo Express. Kind of a self contradicting name if you ask me… "Look at that table over there." Ness motioned over with his thumb. "That guy is from the Escargo Express." "Yeah?" Alex said. "Remember when we ordered the strawberry tofu dispenser for Electra a couple days ago?" "Yeah." Jeff said. "Well, that's the guy who was supposed to deliver it." "And?" Alex asked. "I say we find out where he 'delivered' it to." The three walked over to him.

"Good afternoon sir." Ness said when they got to the table he was sitting at. "Um… hi?" "We have recently acquired the information that you had to order a strawberry tofu dispenser." "How?" "Because we were the people you were supposed to order it to." "Oh uh sorry I kinda lost it…" "Well we need to know where you 'lost it'" "I accidentally dropped it in a hole in the desert..." "Well thanks we'll go find it." The heroes were about to walk back to the bar when they heard screaming outside. "What the heck?" Ness asked. "Come on, we need to check it out." Jeff said. The three ran outside to see what was going on. "What's going on!" Ness yelled when they got outside. "Someone's dying!" One of the people in the crowd shouted. Ness parted the crowd with psychic powers and then looked at the person lying on the ground gasping for breath. "EVERDRED!" Ness yelled running over to him. "Everdred are you alright?" "No, someone shanked me and I'm dying." "Oh no! PSI HEALING!" "That's not gonna work, the wounds are too deep." "Well shoot." "Ness, my friend, there is one last thing I need to tell you." "Yeah?" "To find Paula you must first retrieve the strawberry tofu dispenser. Then you must find your way through the Monotoli building because because the elevator is out." "How do you know these things?" "Because I got earthbound when it originally released…" He then let out his last breath. Once the crowd walked away, Alex walked up and checked his pulse. "Um… he's just holding his breath." Everdred proceeded to push Alex away from him, ran into the nearest alley way, and hid in the dumpster. "I think it's best not to dwell on these things." Alex said getting up, and Ness and Jeff nodded in unison.

On their way through the desert a monkey ran up to them. "Ki ki ko kieu! (Dalarama has finished fasting and would like to see you three. He believes he holds something of great importance to you three." "Lead the way." Jeff said.

The three heroes arrived in Dalarama's cavern. After a hectic trek through the maze of a cave, they arrived in Dalarama's chamber. "So you have come for the strawberry tofu dispenser?" Dalarama asked. "Yes." Ness said. "Fantastic, here it is. Now be on your way."

And so that was the chapter. If you have any suggestions on what I should start doing or stop doing in these fanfictions, feel free to post a review.


	13. The sweet smell of progress

Hey everybody! I'm back! I recently got a new computer and I have to use Microsoft word starter office thing instead of word, I'll also be using the justified format. So that's new.

After hours of back-tracking through the cavern our beaten, battered, and exhausted heroes made it out. "We made it!" Alex exclaimed, his voice cracking. "Unfortunately, I think Jeff passed out a few hours ago, either that or he died." Ness said. "Well you forced me to carry him… so y'know..." Alex said. "OOH!" He exclaimed a few seconds later. "What is it now!?" Ness said, exasperated. "I can try out something that I thought of!" Alex exclaimed… again. "Well pray tell, how do you do it?" Alright, if I rub my hands together and charge them with PSI… ELECTRICITY! Now I can shock Jeff awake if I…" *ZAP* "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?" Jeff yelled, jumping up. "Well I'll be darned… it worked!" Ness said. "What worked? my chest is still stinging!" Jeff said angrily. "Well, I tried to shock you back to life like that thing in the hospitals… what's it called?" Alex asked. "I WASN'T DEAD YOU MORON!" *SMACK*

"Kieu kiki ku ki! *I hate to break up the fun fest, but, Dalarama sent me to teach you how to teleport.* Ki kuku kieu KI! *wanna learn how?* "NO! WE WANNA DIE FROM HEATSTROKE AGAIN!" Jeff retorted sarcastically, and angrily. "Kieu… *suit yourself…*" "I WAS KIDDING!" *cartoon wipe*

Ness, Jeff, and Alex learned PSI teleport! "Great… let's go find Ness's girlfriend." Alex said casually. "She's not my girlfriend!" Ness yelled. "By the way, second time we had to rescue her." Alex said. *Ness…* *Huh? Who's in my mind!?* *It's Paula!* *Oh… Sorry… I haven't heard your voice in, like, eight chapters.* *I know… I'm being held in the Monotoli building.* *Monopoly* *It's Monotoli!* *I know, just joking!* *Get here ASAP!* "Hey guys! I just got word from Paula! She's being held at the monopo- Monotoli building!" Ness told the rest of the group. "Alright! Let's try out our new ability!" Alex said. The three began running and used PSI teleport!

And so the three heroes arrived in Fourside and walked into the monopo- err Monotoli building. "I forgot how big this place was!" Ness exclaimed. "Meh…" Jeff said looking the opposite direction. "Well… to the elevator." Alex said walking over.

On the 20th floor, the elevator stopped. "This isn't right…" Jeff said walking out. "Ya think?" Alex asked. "Better find the stairs, than." Ness said. After searching for a while, the guys came across a robot. "What is this?" Jeff asked, rhetorically. "I dunno." Ness said. "Ness, that was rhetorical." Jeff said. "Rhetoriwhat?" Ness asked. "Never mind…" Jeff said, covering his face with his palm. "*ROAR!*" The robot let forth a mighty bellow. "Charming." Alex said flatly. The robot engaged Ness, Jeff, and Alex in hand to hand combat. Alex opened up with PSI dragon spirit! His offense increased by 400! His defense lowered by 400! Alex's HP was cut 50%! Alex's Gut's increased by 50%! Alex can now breathe fire instead of guard! "DUUUUUDE!" Ness yelled. "What?" "When the heck did you get that!?" "While grinding for my atlatl." "You got a lot of things while doing that." "Uh huh." "Do I have an ability like that?" Yep, I gave it to you a few moments ago. "Thanks narrator!" No problem. Ness used PSI dragon soul! Ness's defense decreased by 200! Ness's IQ increased by 100! Ness's PP increased by 100! Ness's HP decreased by 200! Ness's luck increased by 100! Ness's Gut's increased by 100! Ness can now fire a meteor instead of guard! Ness can now charge Alex with PSI and throw him instead of retreat! "That's pretty cool." Jeff said. Jeff fired his bazooka! Kerboom! The robot ate a bologna sandwich and recovered all its health! "What was that?" Jeff asked. "What was what?" Ness asked back. "He just ate a sandwich and recovered all his health." Jeff answered. "So?" Ness asked back again. "He just survived an explosion from a bazooka and recovered from it with a sandwich." Jeff said in his usual flat tone. "Oh… right."

The battle continued for a while and the heroes kept bashing away at the robot, but to no avail. Alex had already passed out from PSI exhaustion and physical exhaustion, Ness was half way to it, and Jeff had nabbed one of Alex's sweet teas. "This is it, I'm out…" Ness said. ACD- er… DCM- wait… The runaway guys…? no… THE RUNAWAY FIVE! Yeah… The runaway five burst in and finished the robot! YOU WON! Level ups!

"Is that kid alright?" The leader asked. "Yeah… he'll be fine." Ness replied. The runaway five said farewell and everyone went to confront Mr. Monotoli.

Ness kicked the door open and marched in. *scree* The familiar noise of someone screeching to a halt echoed through the room. "P-Pokey!?" Ness sputtered as he walked into the room, seeing his old "friend". "Hello, Ness." "What are you doing here?" Ness asked. "My dad has a good standing with Mr. Monotoli." "So?" "So I'm the vice president of Monotoli Co.!" "And?" "And I'm not your friend anymore!" "Good for you, we just came for Paula." "Well, she's behind the book case, but you can't get past unless you know the secret knock! MUAHAHAHA!" "Nice try Pokey!" *BONG!* The sound of a frying pan hitting the back of someone's head rang through the room. "That was for flirting with me, creep!" Paula said angrily. "PAULA!" Ness yelled running over to hug her. "How lovely, the couple's back together." Alex said sarcastically. *BONG* "OW!" Paula hit Alex with her frying pan. (If you're wondering why Pokey isn't speaking, he's unconscious.) "Even if you keep hitting me with that frying pan, you know deep down that you love me!" *CRASH!* Paula kicked Alex out the window! "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!" *crunch* "MY LEGS!"

And so our heroes rescued Paula (again) and went on to do more hero stuff!

Hope everyone enjoyed this longer chapter! I'll try to make them like this or more from now on, but I can't guarantee!


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